Towards Commitment

Over the last few months, I have been trying to find a church to attend regularly. I was reminded of this video, trying to find the PERFECT church.

It was clear to me after attending national orientation and going to a few Presbyterian churches in New Orleans, that I did not want my home church to be Presbyterian. Too liturgical and too white for my comfort. The whole "call and response" thing freaks me out every time. 

To be clear, I'm not saying that these worship methods are wrong by any means, just that they are not my personal preference.

So I created a list of what I wanted in a church: multi-ethnic, contemporary worship songs, and lots of Spirit.

I went to one church that was okay, but I didn't immediately love it. Also, their air-conditioning was a little too high for my comfort level. I would continue searching.

The next church I went to was falsely advertised and the moment I stepped in, I knew that it would fill none of my requirements. I left before the sermon even began.

The third church I went to filled all of my requirements! Finally! But throughout the service, I just kept thinking about how I would rather be at the first church. This church had no economic diversity or age diversity, they were all families in their 30s.

Around this time, I realized that I was searching for exactly the church that I had in North Carolina. I wanted racial, economic, and age diversity. I wanted contemporary music and a pastor who led by the Spirit. I wanted someone in the congregation to reach out to me and take me into their home and love me as a daughter. I wanted there to be fellowship time during the service to actually get to know the people around me. I wanted the church to be a 5 minute drive away.

Actually, I wanted it to be better than my church in North Carolina. I was looking for a church that had doctrine that more aligned with my own and ironed out the issues that I had with my other church.

In summary, I was looking for a perfect church according to my own understanding. 

But 1) I'm a human, so my understanding of what a church "should" be is imperfect; and 2) churches are made up of imperfect humans, which means that no church will be a perfect representation of God's love.

Again, I was being prideful by elevating my own perspective.

But if I've learned anything from my church in North Carolina or watching my parents intentionally stay committed to their church home despite major changes, it's that church is about relationship and commitment.

More than being about the type of music or air-conditioning level, church is a place to build relationships with others who encourage you and will keep you accountable. It's not about perfect relationships, but about genuine ones.

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.

Hebrews 10:24-25

Like finding a friend, I would say that church searching is about finding a place you feel comfortable and then staying committed to flourishing, rather than giving up on each other, despite the flaws that exist.

~

Update: the fourth and fifth churches that I went to felt like cultural experiences, but not a genuine church home. In other words, my academic Religious Studies brain was processing what was happening instead of my faith actually being engaged. I finally decided to go regularly to the first church that I visited and I'm very excited to get more involved!